Living With An Alcoholic Spouse: A Healthy Detachment

The best thing you can do when dealing with an alcoholic spouse is to detach from the abuse of the alcoholic. You can do this if you truly love your spouse and want to help them to possible sobriety. The more you focus all your energies on the alcoholic, the less likely he is to get sober. This article focuses on how you can detach and remain healthy mentally.

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Don't Make Alcoholism Your Problem

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If you have never read any of the Al-anon material then you probably don't know that you are making the disease of alcoholism YOUR problem. One of the sad facts of living with an alcoholic is we become just as mentally and emotionally sick as the alcoholic. This happens because every step of life we take, and every breath of air we breathe has some involvement with the alcoholic. Our emotions overtake our own mental health as we try and cope with the deterioration of the alcoholic in our life. What are we doing wrong? We are concentrating too much on the disease, instead of concentrating on our mental and emotional health. We may as well be tipping the bottle for them. Better yet, we may as well be drinking with them!

Don't Enable

Most spouses of alcoholics don't realize they are helping their spouse drink just by a few simple behaviors and actions. Several ways in which you may be enabling your spouse to drink is by buying them alcohol, drinking with them, calling the boss and or family members for him because he is too hung over or too drunk to do it himself. Lying to friends, boss, family and co-workers about him and his drinking problem. Taking them to the store, arguing with them, and behaving like a victim. You are not the victim of alcoholism until you make yourself BEcome the victim.

Get Off The Pity Pot

Get off of the pity pot and begin living for yourself, instead of living for the alcoholic. "Oh poor me, everyday I am suffering and I can't take it anymore" attitude won't get you anywhere. You need to take care of yourself and that cannot be done if you are focusing all of your attention on the alcoholic and what he is doing or what he isn't doing. Start focusing on what you can do for yourself. Get out of the house, don't hang around the alcoholic, and don't let them abuse you with their words. If you care about the alcoholic in your life, this is what helps them more than anything else.

Detach With Love

You are powerless to getting your loved one to stop drinking. The first step in being able to detach is by realizing that the shenanigans of the alcoholic is not your problem. Don't try and fix their messes for them. Not only does this enable them to continue drinking, but also it justifies their drinking. Don't have any interaction with the alcoholic while they are drinking; that includes, talking and arguing with them. Why fuss and fight with someone who has lost the ability to make any sense? Don't become ensnared in the alcoholic trap with them. Stay out of the trap, so you can help them. Ninety-five percent of what an alcoholic says is manipulative and hogwash anyway. Don't start believing in the lies of the disease. Separate yourself from the antics of the alcoholic.

Pray For The Alcoholic

I can't tell you how important the process of daily prayer can be. Not only does it bring you closer to God but it will also get you into the habit of going to God with your life challenges. God does hear your cries of pain and He will give you the answers you need to get through your trials and tribulations, even if your spouse continues to drink. Be patient and remain faithful in the Lord and He will deliver you from your suffering.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. (Philippians 4:6)

Living With An Alcoholic Spouse: A Healthy Detachment

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The Best Healthy Alcoholic Drinks

A lot of people think that in order to get healthy, they need to give up all alcohol. Fortunately, this is not the case. Here's a guide to healthy alcoholic drinks that will allow you to celebrate a little without getting a beer belly in the process.

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The Health Benefits of Alcohol

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When consumed in moderation, alcohol has more positive long-term health implications than negative ones. It increases insulin sensitivity, reduces your chance of getting diabetes, and increases HDL (good) cholesterol.

However, the risks of drinking too much are massive, from car accidents to liver damage. So keep it classy, and stick with just a drink or two every night.

Sugar - Your Worst Drinking Buddy

But just because you're drinking in moderation doesn't mean you're being healthy. Most popular drinks are so loaded with sugar to drown out the alcohol taste that you might as well be drinking pancake syrup. Excess sugar in the diet can lead to obesity, diabetes, and even tooth decay. Not good. The key characteristic of all healthy alcoholic drinks is that they contain little to no sugar.

The Best of the Best

So if the best drinks are those that aren't full of sugary mixers, it stands to reason that the healthiest drinks are the "straight" ones. Dry wines are a great bet. Beer can be problematic - they don't call it a beer gut for nothing! It's best to stick with light beers with lower carb counts.

If you enjoy mixed drinks and cocktails, you have a wide variety of things to mix with. However, mixers are often problematic due to their high sugar content. The best solution is to use soda water and a squeeze of lime. But many mixers also come in diet versions, with lower sugars and calories. Stick with diet tonic and sodas when you can. Here's a list of drinks that are the best bets:

Dry champagne (look for wines labeled "brut") Dry white wine (sauvignon blanc, chardonnay) Dry red wine (syrah, pinot noir, cabernet sauvignon) Light beer (such as Amstel Light)

As you can see, living a healthy lifestyle doesn't need to mean giving up on happy hour with your friends. Just stick with these healthy alcoholic drinks and don't make a fool of yourself. Cheers!

The Best Healthy Alcoholic Drinks

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