Monday, September 5, 2011

Coping With an Alcoholic Who Lies Constantly

How can you tell when an alcoholic is lying? Their lips are moving. Coping with the lying nature of the problem drinker is better done through accepting the fact that lies are a way of life for most substance abusers.

alcoholics anonymous big book

Why do they lie so much? Let's face it; they are living in a world of denial. It's really not important to understand why they do this, just accept the fact and leave them alone when they twist the truth.

ALCOHOLIC

The sooner you can accept that lying is a part of the alcoholic's lifestyle the better you will be able to cope. Dealing with someone who is not telling the truth is frustrating because it causes us to want to argue with them that they are not telling the truth.

When we stop confronting them, then there will be a lot less finger pointing going on.

When we learn that we do not have to try and prove to them that we know they are telling us a lie, then our frustration level will go down. The truth of the matter is that their frustration level will go down as well. In return, all will be at peace in a dysfunctional kind of way. I can promise you that there will be a whole lot less arguing going on too.

What is the point of confronting an alcoholic who is lying anyway? You know they are just going to deny the truth and stand up for the false reality that they perceive to be truth.

Alcoholic liars come in every shape and form, from a teenage son, daughter, spouse, mom, dad, grandmother to a grandfather. When they are caught up in the grip of their addiction, they will have no respect for anyone, including themselves. If you can believe this, they really don't want to be they way that they are. It's an addiction that takes even the most respectable human beings into some of the shadiest places on earth.

The alcoholic lies about drinking because of the guilt and shame that accompanies their lifestyle. Have you ever know anyone who wanted to be an alcoholic when they grew up? Of course not; no one sets a goal to be addicted to some type of drug or substance.

The best way of coping (or, "dealing) with this problem is to just accept the truth and let them tell their lies without you pretending to be the private investigator who knows what really happened. Just let them live their dysfunctional life and you enjoy yours without the additional fight for the day. Unfortunately, lying is a comfortable way of life for the alcoholic. If you're going to cope with it, you must kick back and get comfortable with them not telling the truth as well.

Coping With an Alcoholic Who Lies Constantly

ALCOHOLIC

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